Employee claims she can’t use Microsoft Windows for “Religious Reasons” : Reddit/r/AskHR


And they let her! You mean, all this time, I could have requested Linux on my corporate laptop for religious reasons!? BRB. Going to HR to explain my actual, deeply-held beliefs on this…

Don’t Get Involved with Things you Can’t Fix, and You Can’t Fix Stupid

Twenty-odd years ago, I was involved in a Product Data Management system implementation. This is just part of a much larger story, but the salient point from the epic saga is that I worked for a psychopath, and he tried hard at making my life difficult. I never figured out why. I think it was because he blamed me for something my previous boss did to his project. Anyway, we’ll get back to him later.

I was operating as a sysadmin, tasked with ingratiating the main admin from France to install an application on our servers, here in the US. At the time, corporate IT had just made it policy that no one but them could have root on machines hosted in their data center. On Unix (as opposed to Windows), I didn’t mind. That works just fine. However, the other admin had made getting root his #1 requirement. I told him of the policy. He didn’t relent. So I tried to elevate the coming train wreck with my management and everyone in corporate IT, hoping that something could be worked out before he arrived.

The guy shows up, shakes my hand, and asks me for the root password. I get on the phone with the main Unix admin. They finally relent, and allow me (because I’ve known them for 6 years by that point) to sudo to root to setup all the prerequisites.

The other admin is furious, tells us he can’t do anything until he gets root, and goes back to his hotel. Next day. Big meeting. Everyone on the phone. Group in one office, corporate IT in theirs, admin from the hotel, boss in the UK. I ask: “Michael, what specific commands do you need to run as root?” He says — get this — “You get in your car, and you turn the key, and it starts up. You don’t know how; it just works.”

In our room, we all just looked at each other in disbelief. First of all, he was talking to a bunch of mechanical engineers who happened to fall into implementing a PDM project. We all understood exactly how cars work. Second of all, everyone on the call would expect “the expert” at installing the application stack to be able to answer the question.

It was clear there was no arguing about it further, and the project had to get done so that he could shuffle off back to France, so they gave him root, and he did his thing from the hotel, and never spoke to me again.

After all the nonsense, you know what the problem was? The application server was configured to run on port 80, out of the box. That’s it! It assumed it would be running on the standard, privileged port. We could just as easily have configured it to run on port 8000, or port XYZPDQ. It didn’t matter! We had a load balancer running on port 80 in front of it. It could have been any port we wanted! Our “expert” admin couldn’t understand that, and my fearless management wouldn’t hold him accountable for such an elementary understanding of what he was doing.

In the weeks after, I realized that my boss had made me the scapegoat with upper management for the situation, because I was the one that tried to head this disaster off at the pass. Since I had sent emails, and talked about it, apparently I was the one who was causing the problem. This was just one of the many conflicts with my psychopathic boss. I had to learn a lot of hard lessons about politics over the 3 years on that project, but this one backfired in the most unexpected way.

Unfortunately, I had basically the same sort of thing happen again a few years ago. I tried to warn my management that IT was telling me something really, really stupid, and that it was going to come to a head in a spectacular way. But they couldn’t understand anything I was telling them, and trusted that IT knew better than I did. The problem is that IT didn’t want me to be working on the project. They felt they should have been the ones to “get the business” to develop it, and were actively trying to slow me down. Unfortunately, I didn’t learn what else to do in this situation except continue to try to educate the people who are looking at me like I’m crazy. Anyway, maybe I’ll blog that one 20 years from now.

Pluralistic: 21 Aug 2022 The Shitty Technology Adoption Curve Reaches Apogee – Pluralistic: Daily links from Cory Doctorow

Office 365 went from being an online version of Microsoft Office to being a bossware delivery-system. The Office 365 sales-pitch focuses on fine-grained employee tracking and comparison, so bosses can rank their workers’ performance against each other. But beyond this automated gladitorial keystroke combat, Offce 365’s analytics will tell you how your company performs against other companies.

That’s right – Microsoft will spy on your competitors and sell you access to their metrics. It’s wild, but purchasing managers who hear this pitch seem completely oblivious to the implication of this: that Microsoft will also spy on you and deliver your metrics to your competitors.

Source: Pluralistic: 21 Aug 2022 The Shitty Technology Adoption Curve Reaches Apogee – Pluralistic: Daily links from Cory Doctorow

I feel like a fool. I watch Microsoft like a hawk, and I didn’t even know about this. Every time I think I’m too cynical about a FAANG company — and Microsoft in particular — I find that I haven’t been nearly cynical enough.

With this new LinkedIn connection, in Outlook, it’s now possible for Microsoft to connect a particular person to a particular user in your current company’s “metrics.” I suppose they could use this to juice search results for recruiters in LinkedIn, or provide reports to potential employers. I wouldn’t put any of this past them.

So True, and So Wrong

This resonates with me. Spend millions on some new equipment to make widgets better? Sure! Spend thousands to improve the functionality of the lifeblood of the company? Well… I don’t know…

Seriously, though, there’s so much wrong with the way this movie treats this plot point. First, there’s the issue where the only other guy who can get in the system doesn’t have all the access. Second, there’s the issue where there are “a million” lines of code in a monolithic application which clearly covers lots of independent systems, and the other guy can’t even begin to track down where the problem might lie. Third, the little grade-school-aged girl says she knows Unix. Fourth, she then navigates a GUI-based filesystem browser — which no one has ever used in any serious capacity — to find and run an executable — starting from /usr, no less — that magically fixes everything.

I always wondered why I never liked the Jurassic movies very much. Maybe this was a large part of the reasoning.

Modern Recruiting, Thanks to LinkedIn

Big Company HR person 1: “Why aren’t we getting good candidates for our open positions? I know! Let’s buy a high-powered HR software to help us qualify applicants through a pipeline, and push them to it from LinkedIn.”

Big Company HR person 2: “That’s a great idea. Let’s take it to the CIO!”

Company spends a lot of money installing a huge system, and then base their entire hiring strategy on it. Candidates apply. System gets stuck. There is no way to contact the company from the application.

Big Company HR person 2: “Why isn’t our new, high-powered application system generating any promising leads?”

No one in HR is allowed to see metrics or logs. IT isn’t looking.

Me, mailing company rep: “Hey, guys, uh, your system is broken.”

Silence.

Me, mailing second company rep: “Guys, really, your system isn’t working.”

More silence. Big Company HR person 1: “Hmm, I guess we’ll never know.” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Thank you, LinkedIn, for reminding me that even here, in 2020 — where we’re all drowning in software, apps, devices, clouds, “things,” and services — more than ever before — it’s about who you know.

UPDATE: After writing this out of my frustration, I got another email bugging me about why I hadn’t finished going through the company’s four-hour application process after the first 15-minute IQ test, and I responded again that their system won’t let me proceed.

Treatment of Others Policy: Strictly Confidential

Just before the holiday break, I got 3 company-wide email missives. I didn’t know any of the people referenced, nor the people who had sent them, nor the people who they were sent on behalf of. Nothing they addressed affected me in any meaningful way, and I have literally no influence on anything they were referring to. I surmise that the vast majority of people who got those emails were in precisely the same situation as I was. I’ve already forgotten everything about them.

It occurs to me that these things might be important for a couple handfuls of people, and it would be better handled in their staff meetings. The company-wide email, talking about the moves of people you’ve never heard of, responsible for ineffable things, mired in our 5-dimensional cross-functional reporting matrix, just seems to me to be a way for senior execs at a big company to flex their muscles, and remind everyone just how terribly, terribly important they are.

At the same time, I got a notice that I had not completed some mandatory training, which was due before the end of the year. One of the modules was about The Company’s classification system, where the classification level determines who can view what documents. It’s very stringent. It reads like a governmental classification system, and I’m sure it was cribbed from one. Because it’s so formal and strict, I have a hard time taking it seriously. Oh, look, our internal memos are classified as confidential. But, really, who cares if a competitor gets one of our planning PowerPoints from the meeting last week. They’re going to be even more bored and unhelped by it than the people who were at the meeting.

As I’m working through the remaining modules, I notice that The Company’s policy on Treatment of Others is marked “Confidential,” and limited to people with a need to know, and who are under a non-disclosure agreement.

Hold the phone.

Isn’t this topic, like, one of the things they work most hard at, and are most proud of? What about it could be considered sensitive at all? Isn’t the point to brag about just how open and welcoming we are? Why would the policy on sensitivity be considered sensitive? Further, why would it be classified as most-sensitive, AND need-to-know, AND under NDA? I would expect them to put it on their public web portal, and point everyone in the world at it.

Is it just me, or does this situation make absolutely no sense whatsoever?

I suspect that The Policies have been created under the direction of The Managers who read some white papers, hired a consulting firm, and were told that they were supposed to do X, Y, and Z with regards to corporate policies. However, they were subsequently written with no critical thought given to the precedence, applicability, or consistency of X, Y, or Z. Nor were any of the procedures or policies tied in any way to actual benefits or protections specific to our company or its businesses. But these managers are very important people, and the decisions were made, and the policies are now Controlled Documents. And now, if I were to reprint the company’s corporate policy on the treatment of others — no matter how much they talk about it to the investing public — I could be subject to immediate dismissal, and possible criminal penalties.

And that’s just Human Resources. Don’t even get me started on the IT policies.

So, I hope people responsible for this forgive me for having a really hard time taking any of their classification seriously. It just seems to me that if you’re going to go to the expense and hassle of making a comprehensive set of policies, you could at least make some people read the stupid things, and make sure that they’re consistent, helpful, and appropriate.

This is a long-standing gripe with me. I’ve seen this in another Fortune 250 before. I complained about it to the right person, and managed to kickstart an effort to fix some of the conflicts, and relax some of the rules that were counterproductive. Unfortunately, the institutionalization runs deeper at my current place, and I’m not in a position to do anything about it this time.