I got an email with a link to a “town hall” about IT. I said to myself, alright, I dare you to tell me something interesting or actionable, and started watching the replay.
The CIO leads off, of course. His first slide is about DEIC, and celebrating/observing Black History Month and the Lunar New Year.
Sigh.
I mean, that’s great and all, but that’s 10 minutes we’re not talking about IT, which is what this meeting is supposed to be about, and which is all I care to hear about. I seriously doubt that people in, say, Europe or China care much about the US Black History Month, or that people in the US care about the Chinese Lunar New Year, for that matter. But, sure, let’s waste time pandering in the name of the current thing.
And then he says he’s able to relax, now that we know Taylor Swift was going to the at the Super Bowl. He doesn’t know what teams were going to play, but he spent a few minutes talking non-ironically about Swift being there.
Again, I mean, that’s great and all, but a half hour in, we’ve now spent thousands of man-hours not talking about IT.
When we finally get around to talking about, you know, information technology, and I find out that we’re apparently using AI to modernize our “corporate operating system.” I know a little about AI. I know a lot about how our internal procedures and organizational systems works. I do not understand how we can get AI to fix any part of this.
Well, it’s a good thing I don’t understand, because he’s not talking about using AI to fix IT. He wants to use “technology” to improve our “safety-ness.” Say wha..? Like, he wants to use AI to improve safety on the factory floor. Huh?! Are we going to buy Tesla robots to pull people’s fingers out of the way of presses?! I’m confused.
Next, we’re apparently going to minimize all “risks” to IT uniformly, without specifying or identifying what any of those “risks” are. So, at least we’ve got that going for us, which is nice. We’re going to do this by 1) reducing “new” findings, 2) eliminating repeat “findings,” and 3) closing “findings” faster. Well, that certainly seems simple. A little light on details, but I’m sure we’ll figure it out.
Then we’re going to “partner” with AI, and it’s going to help us be more “exponential.” Except that we’ve also been sent a company-wide email that says we’re not allowed to use AI for, well, anything!
After an hour and a half, I gave up watching. I just want to note that the leader of “transformation” just bought a new-fangled “Mac” and says he’s “challenged” to set it up.
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